Omega Mart is the Best Thing in Las Vegas, and the Grand Canyon is on Fire

I'd already suspected the part about Omega Mart, but it's good to have it confirmed!

The older kid and I have been planning her 21st birthday trip to Las Vegas since long before she was 21. We like spectacle, and oddities, and immersive experiences of all sorts. We like buffets and novelty doughnuts. Resort swimming pools. Wandering around and looking at stuff. 

And it wasn't exactly high culture, but Las Vegas had all of that, more than enough to keep us completely entertained for the four days we spent there. 

But technically, the second thing we did upon arriving in Las Vegas was leave it to drive to the Grand Canyon for 24 hours.

The first thing we did was go to Omega Mart!

The kid and I have been to Otherworld, an immersive experience in Columbus, Ohio, so we sort of knew what we were getting ourselves into. 

Except we didn't, because Omega Mart is beyond anything we've done before. The space is set up as a real-ish grocery store, with both fakey products for display and fakey products that you can really buy.

Such as the spray horse!

You wander around and browse Omega Mart, until perhaps you discover a portal to another dimension. You pass through--

--and you're in another world!

Apparently, these slides used to be functional, but they had to be partially dismantled because they were super dangerous. 

The kid thought that this genuine pay phone was particularly exotic, and she had to be instructed on the steps to use it:

There is a lot of lore involved, including an inexpensive swipe card that you can purchase to get deeper into the backstory, but we were plenty busy (and overstimulated!) this first time just by sightseeing and looky-looing. You can still get pretty far into the lore without the extra steps, anyway:

I swear, though, that I have never been so overstimulated in my life. I was flat-out longing for some Loops, and if they sold them in the Omega Mart I bet they'd make bank!

Can you have an immersive art installation without an infinity mirror? Experience tells me no.

After a couple of hours, hopefully you can find out how to portal yourself back into Omega Mart, and then you'll find that somehow you still haven't seen all the things there are to see there!

Eventually, we bravely made our way back into the furnace that was Las Vegas in mid-July, discovering that the city is nearly as weird outside as it is inside Omega Mart--

So much space alien theming in Las Vegas! I'd sort of wanted to go to a specific spot I'd heard about where you can park and see the JANET flights take off and land at the Las Vegas airport, but we didn't have time.

I am unabashedly looking forward to the Sphere THE MOST!!! It's so giant and stupid!

--and after hitting up the grocery store for water, sunscreen, peanut butter, bread, and tampons--you know, all the essentials!--it's off to the Grand Canyon...

...with a pit stop at the Lake Mead National Recreation Area Visitor Center:

Back in tropical weather, just a month after our last palm tree sighting!

I LOVE myself a giant topographic map. You can see right where we are!

And where we are is right here!

I'd wanted to detour over to the Hoover Dam, and I'm not gonna lie, it's because I wanted to buy a "This is My Dam T-Shirt" from the gift shop, but I ALSO wanted to see the sun set over the Grand Canyon. Natural wonders won over the wonder of human engineering, so off we drove:

One of my favorite things about traveling is renting a car with a nice, big screen for the GPS and a Bluetooth for my Spotify. We listened to so many podcasts on this drive!

Also: new-to-us road trip snacks! This one was gross, but the kid got a Monster slushie that apparently hit.

We were staying overnight at a cabin in Bright Angel Lodge, just steps from the South Rim of the Grand Canyon, so our first stop wasn't even a glorious natural wonder, but instead the lobby of the lodge. As my partner was checking us in, the kid and I wandered into the gift shop next door, and look at who I found!

There is a whole series of these books and I'm obsessed with them all, but Death in Yellowstone is my favorite.

You'll be pleased to know that everywhere we went on the next day, I recapped who had died there and how. Did you know that the greatest risk factor in dying in the Grand Canyon is being male? And that a surprising number of those men die from picking up a rattlesnake with their bare hands?

Anyway, this whole time I was REVVED UP to get my first sight of the Grand Canyon, and even more so to see the look on the kid's face when SHE got her first sight of the Grand Canyon. I took her there when she was six, but she doesn't remember it (even though her sister, who was four years old at the time, still does!). So imagine the look on MY face when I look up from browsing Grand Canyon hoodies (I both constantly do not need and constantly desperately want a new hoodie from every tourist attraction I visit) to see that 1) this gift shop has a giant wall that's just a window looking out onto the Grand Canyon, and 2) beyond that window is just... orange-brown nothingness:

Because right. The North Rim of the Grand Canyon is currently experiencing a terrible wildfire. I'd been following it on the news, but just because I'm interested in the Grand Canyon, and not because I thought it would affect my visit--the North Rim is a really long way from the South Rim!

But not as far if you're smoke, I guess...

Just... I don't want to be one of those tourists that doesn't give a fuck about the real-world conditions of the place I'm visiting, and the fire is so terrible and destroying a lot of beautiful natural and human-made wonders and the firefighters are risking their lives to try to contain it and everything... but oh, my god, we rented a car and drove for hours and the whole purpose of the Grand Canyon is the view and then we get there and THIS is what we see?!?

Oh, well. A smoky day at the Grand Canyon is better than a clear-sky day sitting at home on my couch!

And the sunset was spectacular:

Tomorrow, we're going to spend the day (hopefully) seeing the sites along the South Rim, then drive back into Las Vegas in the evening.

P.S. Want to follow along with my craft projects, books I'm reading, road trips to weird old cemeteries, looming mid-life crisis, and other various adventures on the daily? Find me on my Craft Knife Facebook page!

There's a New Play Dough Size in Town!

And by "town," I mean my Pumpkin+Bear etsy shop, of course.

I'm running out of my current stock of containers that I've been using for my 1-pound play dough listings for years, so the other day I bought some new containers that said they were 16 ounces. It turns out that either I don't know what 16 ounces is, OR that my play dough is so fluffy that it defies common standards of weight and measure, because these guys only hold TWELVE ounces of my super soft, super fluffy, dye- and fragrance-free homemade play dough!

Oh, well. Guess I've got a new Pumpkin+Bear listing, then!

You can still buy my play dough in its original 1-pound containers for a little longer, and at some point I'll get back to the big restaurant supply store to experiment with a new container, but I'll keep around these 12-ounce guys, too:

I do need to test how much of my dyed play dough will fit in these containers, though, yikes. My dyed play dough is EVEN FLUFFIER than my dye-free play dough!

P.S. Want to make my absolute best play dough yourself? Here's my recipe!

P.P.S. Want to follow along with my craft projects, books I'm reading, road trips to weird old cemeteries, looming mid-life crisis, and other various adventures on the daily? Find me on my Craft Knife Facebook page!

Tutorial: Make a Favorite Quote Bookmark

I first wrote this tutorial for Crafting a Green World way back in 2014.

Even if you’ve got a favorite passage from a favorite book, you don’t have to go through the trouble of cutting up that favorite book just to make a bookmark out of it.

Instead, make your bookmark even more special by using your own handwriting to write out that favorite quote on upcycled paper. Whether your handwriting is awesome or ugly, Tolkien’s best is still the most meaningful when written in your own hand.

To begin, source out a truly special piece of upcycled cardstock-weight paper; the back of the bookmark will remain unembellished, so this is a nice place to use an old record album cover that has a lovely graphic, or the box that contains your favorite brand of granola.

If you don’t mind the back of your bookmark being blank, you can use an old file folder, and if you want total creative control even over the back of your bookmark, you can sand down even an existing graphic and paint or embellish it however you’d like.

I think the most pleasing dimensions for a bookmark are 2″x6″, but, of course, the dimensions of your own bookmark are up to you. Measure out your favorite dimensions and cut the bookmark out by hand, or make yourself a template so that you can make tons of bookmarks for everyone in your life who has ever wanted a bookmark.

Using a miniature hole punch, you can either punch the hole at the top of your bookmark before you write your quote or after. You might like to punch your hole before, so that you don’t punch through any of your writing later; I like to punch after, so that my writing doesn’t get misaligned by trying to avoid that hole.

The most important part of this bookmark, however, is the writing! Choose a pen or pencil that is archivally safe, if you don’t want your writing to fade over time–it’ll happen more quickly than you think! I like to use a black Flair pen, but if you’re feeling extra fancy, calligraphy is always an option.

If you want the entirety of a particular passage on your bookmark, practice it in advance in the approximate space. Otherwise, you can just continue until your space runs out. I write pretty small, and I was able to write just about one entire page from a paperback on the particular bookmark in the photo above.

To make the bookmark’s tassel, cut twice the length of the bookmark from embroidery thread or yarn, then thread it through the hole punch and tie it around the top of the bookmark. Knot the ends of each thread and yarn piece so that it doesn’t unravel.

The only problem with this bookmark is that whenever I’m reading a book that’s NOT Harry Potter (it happens less often than you’d think…), glancing at my bookmark as I find my place always makes me want to stop what I’m doing and read Harry Potter again.

P.S. Want to follow along with my craft projects, books I'm reading, road trips to weird old cemeteries, looming mid-life crisis, and other various adventures on the daily? Find me on my Craft Knife Facebook page!

How to Make a Comic Book Bookmark

I originally wrote this tutorial for Crafting a Green World way back in 2017.

Don’t you dare dog-ear that book! That’s what bad people do.

To make it even easier to not deface great works of literature, you can make yourself a set of bookmarks out of my *other* favorite genre of reading, the comic book. Comic books or any other upcycled papers, are easy to turn into sturdy, fun, useful bookmarks. Here’s how:

1. Source some comic books. My local comic book shop has a back room full of comic books that are a quarter each. There are no diamonds to be found in this rough, you can be sure, but it’s pretty easy to find a bad comic book featuring your favorite characters (you can’t tell how 70s corny Tony Stark is drawn if he’s in his Iron Man suit!), or a comic book so awful that it’s awesome again (those dinosaur mercenaries *might* have seemed cool to kids, but they also dated strippers, soooo… yeah) there. 

Another great place to find comic books is any garage sale, anywhere, and that’s also where you can find other great books that would also make good bookmarks. Seriously, wouldn’t you love a bookmark made from a page from Sweet Valley High? Or that Harry Potter with its cover ripped off? It needs to be made into bookmarks!

2. Fussy cut bookmark fronts. On a piece of scratch cardboard, draw a simple rectangle that’s about 2″x6″. Cut it out, round the corners if you’d like, and use it as a template to trace and cut out bookmark fronts.

Cut outside the lines of the bookmark fronts, and you’ll be able to neatly trim them after they’re attached to the bookmark backs.

3. Adhere the bookmark fronts to cardstock backs. The quickest, easiest method is to stick the bookmark fronts to adhesive-backed cardstock, then cut inside the lines of the bookmark to cut out the complete bookmark, front and back together.

You’ll have more options for cardstock, however, if you use glue or adhesive spray. You could use the cardboard from cereal boxes or other food packaging, record album covers, file folders, or anything with cardstock consistency that will give the needed sturdiness to the paper bookmark fronts.

Once the fronts and backs of the bookmarks are attached, and you’ve given enough time, if needed, for any adhesive to dry, cut just inside the lines of the bookmark front to neatly trim both front and back together.

4. Add a tassel. Use a hole punch with a small diameter to punch a hole in the top center of the bookmark, then add a tassel. Options for the tassel include embroidery floss, yarn, twine, necklace chains, or strips cut from T-shirts or plastic grocery bags.

No matter the material you use, cut it to twice the length of the bookmark, thread it through the hole, then double knot it at the top of the bookmark. Pieces such as embroidery floss or yarn will also need to be knotted at the other end to keep them from unraveling.

5. Seal the front? Maybe! If you’re worried about the fact that your bookmark front is likely made from a non-archival material, you may choose to seal it. I wouldn’t worry about it too much, though.

I think it’s better to have too many bookmarks rather than too few, so make as many of these bookmarks as you’d like, and to get buy-in from the kids, be sure to make some bookmarks out of their favorite things, too–that’s how our bookmark collection now includes Harry Potter, Thor and Iron Man, Garfield, G.I. Joe, Sherlock Holmes, and Spider-man.

And I'm always on the lookout for a super beat-up copy of The Hunger Games, if you've got one!

P.S. Want to follow along with my craft projects, books I'm reading, road trips to weird old cemeteries, looming mid-life crisis, and other various adventures on the daily? Find me on my Craft Knife Facebook page!

I Want To Smoosh This Rainbow Unicorn Pillow Into My Face While I Scream

From happiness, of course! Because LOOK at it!

This pillow was a birthday present for my niece, who is at the perfect age for rainbow unicorns, and whose bedroom, when I visited this summer, looked like a rainbow unicorn threw up all over it, but in, like, the best of ways. 

My bedroom looks like a 1980s yard sale had a fight with a tornado and they both took turns throwing up afterwards. I should dust, and I really should declutter.

So I knew I wanted to sew the kid something rainbow unicorn (I got the feeling from looking at her bedroom that anything from Disney or having to do with construction equipment would also work, but I was really personally feeling the rainbow unicorn vibes), but it took a while to settle on what I wanted to make. Maybe a little unicorn stuffie with a rainbow yarn mane? A much bigger unicorn stuffie with a tubby little tummy VERY stuffed with fluffies? This hat is stinking adorable, but I JUST finished using up almost all the fleece in my fabric stash and I loathe the idea of collecting more. I didn't feel like learning paper piecing for this project, but it was seriously getting on my nerves that all the paper piecing rainbow unicorn projects were so pretty!

I kept coming back to this Lisa the Unicorn quilt block pattern, and eventually I convinced myself that it wouldn't be as tricky to piece as it looked, and that its giant (26"x26"!) size would work as a giant decorative pillow after the big kid pointed out that this is literally the standard Euro pillow size that she's used on her bed for years and the last time I bought her a new pillow didn't I bitch that I could only buy them in packs of two and so I'd just have a second big-ass pillow kicking around my linen closet for years on end?

My memory is NOT a steel trap, but I do tend to at least vaguely recall my bitchiest moments, so I did sort of remember the entire bitchfest that was shopping for the kid's first college stuff. I checked Amazon, and indeed, back in 2022, just in time for college dorm shopping, I did buy two ridiculously big-ass 26"x26" pillows (See? I even remember the content of my bitching!), and when I dug back into the dark depths of my linen closet I DID find a brand-new 26"x26" pillow insert still in its packaging. I also found a brand-new throw pillow insert in a packaging meant for two that I have NO memory of what I could have possibly done with the first pillow, but now I can make the big kid a cute throw pillow cover for the couch in her college apartment, and omg I have so much room in my linen closet!

I had a LOT of help picking out the rainbow unicorn colors of the mane--

 

--and I think this is the first project in which I've actually had to label all my pieces to keep them straight:

Although I'm sure it actually didn't, it felt like cutting out all the pieces took a LOT longer than it did to sew them all together. The piecing felt like it went really quickly, and it came together so nicely!

It took long enough, though, that while I worked I watched almost the entire first season of Vikings, before deciding I didn't really like it all that much and bailed, so then I rediscovered a long-ago old favorite, the Double Love podcast, so I sewed all the rest of my unicorn listening to Jessica's machinations and Elizabeth's justifiable dithering over whether or not she actually even likes Todd:

Just between us, Todd deserves better, and I don't even like him!

Fortunately, it was summer when I sewed this, so I had my living captives adult children home and could make them come admire every new part I pieced. It just kept getting cuter and cuter!

Here it is completely pieced and ready to quilt! I was stoked to use stash batting leftover from my flannel foster kid quilt, but ugh, I really need to find a nice, big bolt of a good cotton-poly blend batting that I can just pull from forever. Lmk if you ever run across a good sale!

And here she is all quilted and ready to be sewn into a pillow cover! I don't like the look of a lot of quilting, but just between us I probably should have put at least one more line of quilting, maybe some stitch in the ditch, in the unicorn's face. Hopefully it won't fall apart after a few washes...

Every summer, a few random and stupid things around our house break, and it always takes us FOREVER to fix them. One year, it was the dryer. One year, it was the oven. One memorable year, it was the entire fucking roof. We've had summers of multi-day power outages and summers in which one car or another just would not stay working. Anyway, this summer it's the riding lawnmower AND the dryer. Working in concert and only spending about twice as much money as we probably needed to, my partner and I finally got the riding lawnmower fixed-ish, provided you agree that stripping a couple of wires, twisting them together, and wrapping the whole thing in electric tape is "fixed," but guess what still isn't working?

Tbh I'm not personally even that mad because hanging laundry to dry is eco-friendly and makes it smell awesome, but the kids were beyond over it by the end of the summer, and probably the only kids at their colleges excited to get back to school so they could do laundry. 

At some point before the weather really kicks in I'm going to have to buckle down and watch one thousand How To Repair Your Electric Dryer YouTube videos, but that day was not this day, and so Lisa the Rainbow Unicorn got to dry prettily on a line in my front yard:

My partner didn't know this so you might not either, but quilting is supposed to be wrinkly and scrunchy after the first wash. Those scrunches are what make it comfy!

And then she got to put her pillow on and pose prettily in that same front yard!

I am so pleased with how she turned out! The instructions were, indeed, complicated, and I highlighted a lot and checked steps off as I completed them, but if you followed them carefully, nearly everything comes out perfectly and all your seams line up just where they should. 

I'd like to make another Lisa the Unicorn as a wall hanging, perhaps with a colorway of blacks and greys, but that's currently pretty far down my list. First I've got to embellish hoodies with the name of the kid's school done in patchwork for her and her best college buddies, then make the other kid a throw pillow, then I need some new pajama pants since that's all I seem to wear these days so I might as well lean into it, and then this ghost patchwork quilt is honest to god SHOUTING my name at me, and then by that time I'll probably have thrifted a couple more hoodies that I can put patchwork ghosts on, too, and by that time I'll need to be thinking about sewing Christmas presents for people.

P.S. Want to follow along with my craft projects, books I'm reading, road trips to weird old cemeteries, looming mid-life crisis, and other various adventures on the daily? Find me on my Craft Knife Facebook page!