Rikers Island Carrot Cake, to You I Say "Meh"

In our house, you get exactly the kind of cake that you want on your birthday.

This year, Sydney had a rainbow cake. Willow had a candy cake. I had a cookie cake. And our Matt, whose favorite cake is carrot cake, had the Rikers Island carrot cake.

Have you heard this story? It's not really an urban legend, since it was in the New York Times and all, but the story, uncovered by professional journalists, is that Rikers Island has delicious carrot cake.

Now, I don't know if there's something truly special about the Rikers Island carrot cake, or if it's, you know, just really good. I mean, the chocolate chip cookies at my elementary school were REALLY good, but it was nothing to interview the cafeteria ladies on Live at Five about or anything.

Anyway, the other obnoxious thing about this carrot cake is that the recipe, thoughtfully printed by the New York Times, is the exact recipe used in the jail. The EXACT recipe. It calls for 25 pounds of sugar! Unless you've got a contract with SYSCO, you're not making this recipe.

Matt broke the recipe down, dividing it into 1/25 of the original, and he and the babes baked it for his birthday. And then it was lovingly doused in cream cheese frosting by Miss Sous Chef #1--

--and Miss Sous Chef #2:

Unfortunately, we were all sadly disappointed by this cake. I don't know if perhaps it just doesn't divide well, and I am NOT going to make the full recipe to see, but it was eggy, and had a weird flavor, and just generally not nummy-licious like a birthday cake should be.

If I was in jail I bet it'd taste better.