Friday, April 7, 2023

Anatomy of a College Student Care Package

The Easter care package is candy-forward, because I know what my kid likes best about Easter!

I have a whole system in place to distract myself from how much I miss my college kid. One night a week, we play Stardew Valley together and call each other on speakerphone so we can talk while we play. One night a week, we use the Hulu Watch Party to watch a couple of episodes of Schitt's Creek together while we gossip in the chat box. One night a week, the whole family Zooms. Once a month, I send her a letter. And once a month, I send her a care package!

I don't do the cute themey care packages that I've seen some parents do, because my kid and I would both think they were corny, but I've been surprised at how much fun it is just to assemble lots of little bits and bobs that I think my kid would like, then write her a little note and send it off! 

It is a constant struggle, though, to remind myself that my kid is a minimalist, and doesn't want any crap that will have to just sit around. If my kid's preferences aren't enough, I also can remind myself of how miserable it was to load the car with all her stuff for college, drive it all there, drag it all into her dorm, and help her unpack it. We'll be doing the same thing in reverse when she moves out (or at least Matt will, because love my college kid as I do, I am going to do EVERYTHING in my power to get out of being the one who goes to pick her up and bring her home at the end of the year!), so I'm very wary of sending her stuff that I'm just going to have to drive back home in a few months. I've been keeping my care packages small on purpose, and sending a lot of snacks, small items that won't take up a lot of room in her luggage, and travel-sized stuff that she can easily use up.

I've been keeping an eye on sales and Clearance racks, and squirreling away care package items as I come upon them. I also sometimes break up multi-packs, and put, say, just a couple of protein bars or pudding cups or hair ties in each care package instead of giving her twelve at once. 

SNACKS, CONDIMENTS, AND INSTANT MEALS


I thought the food at my kid's college was going to be AWESOME, because they fed us two meals when we were there for her Admitted Students Day visit, including one meal in the student cafeteria with the current students, and everything was absolutely delicious! But apparently the food they serve when guests are present is a lie, the poor kid, and mostly the meals are bland and repetitive.

And this is a kid who is certainly not accustomed to eating lovely prepared gourmet meals at home, so it MUST be bad!

Her cafeteria is also a short walk from her dorm, and it doesn't sell snacks, so there's plenty of room for care package treats that are quick and easy meals that she can make in the comfort of her own dorm, or make good study snacks, or add a bit of welcome flavor to the typical cafeteria fare. Here are some ideas:
  • candy
  • dried fruit
  • fruit cups
  • Goldfish crackers
  • granola bars
  • homemade treats. I bought some small disposable aluminum loaf pans that are perfect for baking mini loaves of banana and pumpkin bread in, or Matt or I will bake her a batch of one of her favorite kinds of cookie.
Her favorite Russian Tea Cookies are a Matt specialty, fortunately, so I didn't have to do any work!

  • hot sauce
  • instant hot chocolate
  • instant noodle cups. She's got a tea kettle, and everyone loves instant noodles!
  • instant oatmeal packets
  • juice boxes/pouches. My kid and I have butted heads her entire life over my reluctance to buy her juice (I maintain that it's literally just nutrient-free sugar water, and she maintains that it's delicious), so putting a couple of juices in a care package is how I let her know I'm spoiling her!
  • lemon juice. She specifically requested this for flavoring the school water. She keeps it in her roommate's mini fridge. 
  • lunchbox-sized foods. You can get most snack foods in single-serving multi-packs. If you buy a few when they're on sale, you can put a small assortment in every care package.
  • microwave popcorn. 
  • nuts
  • peanut butter squeeze pouches and crackers
  • protein bars
Actual footage of me texting my kid at the grocery store to ask her again what her favorite flavors of Luna bars are.

It's these!!!
  • pudding cups
  • tea bags. 
  • trail mix. 
  • vitamins
CLEANING SUPPLIES AND TOILETRIES

There's a drugstore in walking distance from campus, but if my kid mentions that she's out of something and I'm about to mail her a care package, I'll toss in whatever she needs. I mean, I'm watching the sales on our regular products, anyway, so I might as well just buy it when it's cheap and squirrel it away for when she wants it! If I'm giving her something different, I'll make it a travel size so she won't be bummed to give it away if she doesn't like it... and so we won't have to lug it home in a few months!

  • chapstick
  • contraceptives
  • deodorant
  • dish soap
  • disinfecting wipes
  • disposable masks. Here are the ones that I buy in bulk for us. I buy myself and each kid our own pack. 
  • drawer sachets
  • face wash
  • first aid supplies/OTC meds
  • hand sanitizer
  • hand soap
  • laundry detergent
  • lotion
  • Lysol. I really like this tiny spray bottle. It's stupid expensive per ounce compared to the full-sized can, but you probably don't want to carry a full-sized can around in your backpack!
  • menstruation supplies
  • mouthwash
  • Plan B. The expiration date on these is very good, so it's okay to just have it on hand.
  • shampoo/conditioner
  • spray cleaner
  • sunscreen
  • tissues
  • toothpaste
  • wet wipes
CLOTHING AND ACCESSORIES

My kid HATES clothes. She hates shopping for them, she hates trying them on, she hates wearing most of them, and she hates owning more than she thinks she "needs," which is never, by the way, as many items as she actually needs. Also considering the fact that if you don't own many clothes, the clothes you do own get worn out a LOT faster than if you have a larger wardrobe, and I feel like most of my time as my kid's parent has been spent secretly throwing away raggedy articles of clothing when she's not looking, wheedling her into trying on something that absolutely has to be tried on but she doesn't want to, or begging her to accept some item that she desperately needs but refuses to replace.

She went through winter in the Midwest with a coat with a broken zipper. Was I allowed to buy her a new coat? No. Instead, she asked if I would send her a pair of pliers to work the zipper with. SIGH!

So I haven't sent my own kid most of the items on this list. I can occasionally get away with sending her something I scored at Goodwill that relates to a fandom she likes, or something warm and cozy (not new-coat cozy, but, like, wool socks cozy):

  • eyeglasses/sunglasses
  • flip-flops/Crocs/shower shoes
  • hair ties
  • hand warmers. We like the disposable ones, but these rechargeable ones are SO AWESOME.
  • hat/gloves/mittens. Warm hats are super easy to sew, and an especially cute one would be a fun addition to a winter care package. 
  • holiday accessories
  • hoodie/sweatshirt/sweater
  • jammy pants
  • slippers
  • socks
  • T-shirts
  • underwear and bras
  • workout clothes
STUDY, RECREATION, AND DORM LIFE SUPPLIES

My college kid is pretty independent by choice, but all the kids there seem so affable that it's not uncommon to get pulled into a group activity or casual hang-out. She also really likes her solo zen time, though, with a quiet activity and a podcast. 
  • adult coloring books
  • Amazon gift card
  • books. When I'm thrifting, I keep an eye out for something my kid will like. Because it's dirt cheap, she can read it and then leave it in her dorm lobby for someone else to take.
  • deck of cards
  • decorations/photos. My kid has a digital photo frame that I keep stocked with cute photos mostly of the pets, but if I'm getting photos printed for whatever reason, I'll include a couple of cute shots of Luna and then send them in the next care package. 
  • DVD player. I ended up buying a CD/DVD player that hooks up to her computer and having it shipped to her. She never plays DVDs for fun, but it turned out that her French textbook had an interactive DVD with it and she needed a player ASAP.
  • earbuds
  • fidgets
  • gel pens
  • handmade something-or-other. So far, I've made and sent a mini notebook, a pencil case, some scrunchies, and a mini Valentine garland in her school colors. 
  • highlighters
  • journal/sketchbook
  • notecards and stamps
  • pencils/pens
  • post-it notes
  • puzzle books
  • small craft/DIY kits. My kid really likes latch hook, and I've been trying to get her into embroidery. 
  • small games. My kid LOVES Timeline, which is fortunately quite compact. Cards Against Humanity is also pretty low-profile. Both games have lots of expansion packs in case she and her dorm mates get super into them.
  • STEAM gift card
  • stuff to share with roommate and dorm residents. I sometimes send my kid double of a treat so she can share with her roommate. Or you can send a bulk bag of candy to leave out for everyone in the dorm kitchen or lobby.
  • stuffed animal. My college kid makes an exception in her minimalist lifestyle for stuffies. She wouldn't want a lot of stuff on her bed, but something super tiny would still be perfectly snuggable.
One thing that I have NOT figured out is how to make mailing these care packages less expensive!!! Her Easter care package contained her bunny onesie from home, a bunch of candy, some homemade cookies, a letter, and an enamel pin, and it cost over thirteen dollars to mail. Add anything heavier, like a book or a game or, god forbid, a full-size bottle of shampoo, and I'm looking at closer to twenty dollars. If I start with a box small enough that I'm confident I can mail it for less than ten bucks, it won't fit enough items for it to feel like a proper care package to me. To be honest, it would probably be cheaper just to buy her stuff off of Amazon and have it shipped directly to her, but that doesn't feel like a proper care package, either!

So if you've got tips for mailing care packages more cheaply. let. Me. KNOW!!!

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